Pittsburgh Pirates vs Patna Pirates: Who deserves the name 'Pirates' more?

Namesake: The logos of Pittsburgh Pirates (L) and Patna Pirates

It is well established that a rose by any other name would indeed smell just as sweet. The question is would a pirate by any other name reek as much? We have here two contenders for the moniker of Pirates. In the left corner, a new heir to the throne, the Patna Pirates of Star Sports Pro Kabaddi seek to make their claim by going head to head with the Pittsburgh Pirates who are scowling and sneering right back at them.

Disclaimer: The Major League Baseball (MLB) team in question here has a storied legacy, one which I'll choose to ignore for the moment. This doesn't in any way take anything away from the team's legacy, and if one were to feel otherwise from this lighthearted poke at it, perhaps it's reputation isn't as rock solid as expected (troll bait, hook, line and sinker).

While we are at it, it would be prudent to rise above the slings and arrows being tossed from both directions and consider this debate from a real pirate's point of view. You could choose Blackbeard, Jack Sparrow or one of those Somali pirates. Who are we to argue if Pittsburgh or Patna deserves the moniker, while the real pirate overlords smile benignly at children playing with sticks. If anyone can claim a right to this nickname, it is a real pirate, period. Falling short of that, the two teams here can lay a claim towards earning their moniker. It will be up to you to decide.

The Logo

First of all, comes the logo. We'll let the defending champions go first. Prepare yourself for a visceral and visual knockout. Feast your eyes upon an image that screams "Prepare to be boarded!"

Pittsburg Pirates logo

Or not. Clearly they are going for subtlety over shock value. Not very piratey some may say. Let us give them another chance, by going back to the logo they used from 1997 to 2013.

Pittsburgh Pirates’ logo from 1997 to 2013

That's what I'm talking about! That pirate's got one mean snarl. And he's armed with baseball bats to boot. There is an axiom I like to follow in life. If I go to some stranger's house and I see a cricket bat, I'll nod to myself and say, “Ah that's a fine lad, devoted to a sport”. If I see a cricket bat and a baseball bat, I'll nod approvingly under skepticism, as multi-sport athletes aren't that abundant. If you see a baseball bat, a cricket bat and a hockey stick, it's safe to presume that these bats are used to hit more than balls.

There is something about the way the bats are placed behind the pirate that leads you to believe that he is willing and quite able to knock over some skulls with his bat. The defending champion has proven to be quite formidable, let's make way for the competition.

Coming at you with nary a "Ahoy Matey!", nor black sails to warn you of the impending doom, comes the Pirate from Patna!

Patna Pirates logo

Blackbeard who? We got ourselves a rebel here. A purple peroxide beard dyed pirate. Although Purplebeard sounds less threatening and more like an experiment gone wrong. I may be biased, but his snarl seems just that much meaner. The pirate from Pittsburgh seems to say that he'll board your ship and loot your wares with no twinge of conscience. The pirate from Patna has a snarl which makes no qualms about his intention to draw and quarter every member of your crew and pillage your wares as an afterthought.

Judging by the headgear, the Pittsburgh pirate is a low ranking mate on the ship, while the Patna pirate has the headgear of a captain adorning his mean, mean head. He's also got the Hulk's colour theme down, green all over with purple highlights.

An astute reader, one accustomed to solving 'Find 6 differences among the two similar looking pictures', may observe that I haven't compared the eyepatches of the two logos yet. Perhaps one could speculate on the back stories which led to two strong men losing an eye. Truth being, pirates didn't wear eye patches because they had one eye.

Pirates with a functional pair of eyes would use a patch and alternate between wearing it on the left eye and right eye when they had to alternate between going out on the deck and going below deck where it would be dark. This would help them save time from having their eyes taking time to adjust to the darkness or having to squint in bright light. One eye would be used under the deck, and one above deck.

That being said, one may think that it is subjective to judge which of the two logos scream "Pirate!!" louder. We'll leave it to you to decide.