Bulls better amnesty booz

C Booz only got this breakaway dunk because he was too lazy to get back on defense.

Numbers suck, plain and simple. There is a reason that I was a math imbecile from the second my happy ass stepped foot into a classroom. I loathed math & numbers then, and I despise them even more now. That is why this won’t be the 826th NBA lockout update you’ve read the past few days. All you need to know on that front is the following…

–The players should have accepted a deal with a 50/50 BRI split (if it was broached, an offer could have been made) because now the spiteful owners will simply pull that offer back and start over. Good call from the paycheck to paycheck crew.

–The players will now lose money that they won’t ever see again. Another brilliant decision by Billy Hunter & band of imbeciles.

–The power agents and star players are only out for themselves. Do you think they care about the fringe players, and rookies? Of course not. The whole “we’re looking out for the young players, and future players” garbage is the biggest bunch of bullshit I’ve read since this pissing match started.

But that’s not why I called.

The only part of this lockout I have ever cared about is whether or not the two sides would agree to implement an amnesty clause that would allow each team the right to whack a player’s contract from their books. The player would still get paid, but the team didn’t have to carry an albatross with them into a new CBA when the rules will be undoubtedly be stricter.

The beautiful news for Bulls fans like myself is that both the players & owners love this idea. The dumb owners who overpaid for bums receive a get out of jail free card, and players can potentially double dip with two contracts.

So yes, the Bulls will have the chance to rid themselves of one of the biggest free agent disasters in franchise history. And no, I’m not forgetting Ron Mercer, Eddie Robinson, or Ben Wallace.

Sure, Gar Foreman did his best after the season to try and praise Carlos Boozer for his 17.5 points & 9.6 boards per game, but the playoffs are all I go by when it comes to a championship contender. I could care less what Mr. No Lift does in a meaningless game in December against the fucking Bobcats. Boozer embarrassed himself in the playoffs (from getting owned by Tyler Hansbrough to disappearing in the Heat series), and he’ll never be the 2nd option that Derrick Rose needs to win a title.

And that’s all that matters here. Winning a 7th title for one of the most important franchises in sports. The Bulls will never do it if captain “give me that” is eating up an average of $13.5 million a year for the next four years on a harder salary cap. The Bulls can’t mess around with D Rose’s prime. The next four years are vital to beating the Heat and hanging another banner or two. Plus, with Rose’s free agency looming, he’s going to want to know that he’ll have a dependable sidekick to run with. And not one who just talks a good game.

Boozer never was (that’s why I never wanted him), and he never will be that 2nd guy. I don’t care about his tweets about waking up at 5am to workout. First of all, he’s lying. That douche probably set the alarm, sent the tweet out, and passed right back out. Secondly, the great ones don’t need to tell the world when they are working out. It’s simply second nature for them. Ugh, I hate this clown.

The other critical aspect of ridding themselves of this contract is that it would position them to be a player for Dwight Howard (free agent in ’12) or Kevin Love (free agent in ’13 unless he’s traded before then. You don’t want to stay in ‘Sota, Kevin. Trust me). How nice would Love look playing the 4 next to Noah? Love has turned into a rebounding machine despite not being able to jump. That is the opposite of Boozer, who just chooses not to jump. Love is a legitimate pick and pop guy that would make teams pay a price for staying with Rose on the high screen and roll. If you remember, Boozer got the ball several times in that Heat series off of pick and roll action and passed up shots.

As for Howard, I’m pretty sure you are aware of his work.

The common theme for the playoffs was, “if he’s not going to defend, he better score.” The bum who tore a toe ligament one of the few times he did jump morphed into a petrified nothing against Chris Bosh.

As aggravated as you probably are with the lockout nonsense, keep in mind the big picture. And that big picture could be erased from memory with my new best friend (the amnesty clause). The only fear is that GarPax will be too embarrassed to admit failure one year into the Boozer nightmare. Man up fellas, it’s a move that has to be made.