Commentary by Ravi Shastri, Virender Sehwag and Sourav Ganguly in an ODI

Ravi Shastri and Sourav Ganguly

New commentary Team of Ravi Shastri, LS(Laxman Sivaramakrishnan), Viru(Virender Sehwag) and SG(Sourav Ganguly).

Ravi: Ladies and Gentleman, we have with us today the Nawab of nazafgadh Viru commentating for the first time. Welcome Viru, Do u like Indian Curry??

Viru: Sure, Ravi. Absolutely, I love it. I must confess that I am a big fan of your commentary and It is my honor to commentate side by side you. The way you use the words so artistically and uniquely and have been using since all these years is just awesome. Is boost the secret of your energy??

LS: Well, Ravi is gone downstairs Viru. India vs Sri Lanka, 7th ODI. India leads 6-0. This is going to be a Super Sunday, Ladies and Gentleman. What do you think SG?

SG: We’ll come to know about that soon, LS. India has got the upper hand in today’s game. India is a terrific one day team. Has always been the dominant team against Sri Lanka. I would like to see them perform better overseas. It is important for a team to perform better overseas. I always judge the team by its record overseas. I think India needs to improve on that regard.

LS: Well, its toss time. Let us go downstairs with Ravi Shastri.

Ravi: “Kasa kae Kolkata”. Oops, so sorry. Actually I’ve covered last 2 one day games in Mumbai and Pune so got a bit confused. “Ki Bhalo Kolkata”. Well it’s another bright and sunny day and looking forward to a great game of cricket. The news from the Center is that MS won the toss and decided to Bat First. Back to u guys upstairs, wait for me, I m coming.

Viru: I loved batting against Sri Lanka. It is because they’ve got lots of spinners. Its the perfect team if you want to come in form. I loved to hit the boundaries and when I torched, I would torch hard. I wish Indian selectors would’ve given me a chance at No.4.

Ravi: uh..Viru, its flash and flashed hard.

Viru: Sure, Ravi. This is my first time so kindly be lenient on me.

SG: I beg to differ from you there, Viru. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. No. 4 is an important position. You need to be on the top of your game. ODI cricket is fine but I always judge a player by his record in test matches when the red ball is swinging and doing all sorts of things.

(Suddenly there is a boundary in the match)

LS: Eeeesily played by Kohli. He’s a good player.

Viru: Yes, LS brilliant shot by the Delhi Batsman. That went like a racer bullet.

Ravi: Uhhh..Its Tracer Bullet, Viru.

Viru: Oh sorry Ravi. I thought all this time that it was racer bullet.

(A wicket fell.)

LS: Good bowling by Malinga. It was a good shot by Rohit but unfortunately he got the elevation but not the distance so he’s gone. And coming in next is Suresh Raina. He’s an asset to CSK. He hasn’t missed a single game for the team. Great performer for his team. Played brilliantly in the..

(interrupted by SG)

SG : uh,LS..i must remind u that this is not IPL going on, otherwise I wouldn’t be sitting here. Although, I am still wondering what prompted me to take up commentary for an Ind-SL cricket match. I must’ve been very free.

LS: Indeed Sourav. These series are meant for me and Arun Lal. If you start commenting in these also, then what would happen of us?? And with the coming of Rahul, VVS and now Viru our scope is reducing anyways.

SG: Sorry LS, I would take care next time.

Viru: Hahaha Dada, very good joke.

Ravi: uh Viru, we don’t usually say stuff like this while commentating.

Viru: Sorry Ravi paji but I am not getting the feeling that this match may go down to the wire, what should I say then??

Ravi: Try to invoke the feeling in u.

(Another wicket falls)

SL: and now Dhoni comes down to the middle. What a captain he has been for India and CSK. Chennai is like his second home, CSK has been the most consistent team..

(Interrupted again by SG)

SG: coming back to the game, Dhoni is a terrific ODI player but he’s yet to prove his effectiveness in test matches both as a captain and as a player. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, I always judge a captain on the no of wins he gets overseas and on that criterion, he lags behind.

Viru: yeah dada,I agree. He rotates players on the basis of fielding standards. Not done, dada. Mera kam to batting karna h na.

(A boundary scored)

Ravi: There u go Viru. Dhoni flashes and flashes hard. U missed the cliché Viru.

Viru: Sorry,Ravi paji

SG: This is poor bowling from the SL bowlers. I think he should push it further up, make the batsman work hard for his runs and bring another catching man in the slips. Greatness of a fast bowler depends on how he bowls in subcontinent conditions which are not suitable for him. That’s the criterion on which I judge bowlers, I’ve said this before. There u see another poor ball.

Viru: That went like a rocket to the boundary. The Indian team is going all guns Blazing now, just get the feeling there’s gonna be a big score in this game.

Ravi: Bingo Viru, superbly done.

Viru: All thanks to u Ravi Paji.

Ravi: All in all, we can say, Cliché is the winner.