Monty Panesar opens up about how he battled mental illness

Monty Panesar, the English slow left-hand orthodox bowler has admitted on seeking professional medical advice to cope with feelings of anxiety and paranoia which led to loss of self-esteem and confidence after he was named as a Professional Cricketers’ Association mental health ambassador.

He admitted that his initial reluctance to take the prescribed medication dented his progress.

Panesar, who represented England last time during 2013 Ashes, is trying to rebuild his career with his first county, Northamptonshire, after been released by Essex due to “off-field issues” at the end of last season and is eyeing a national comeback after spending three years out of the team.

“I went on medication. It calmed things down in my mind and took away the symptoms of being paranoid,” he said to PCA. “I didn’t believe in medication. I have been brought up to say it isn’t good for you. There are always side-effects to every medication you take.”

34-year-old spinner added: “The people who were helping me did see a change. They said to me it would it take three to six months to get back to where I need to be. You have got to take one step at a time and be patient with the whole process and eventually have the faith that things will get better.”

It’s important to speak out: Panesar

After 'living in denial for quite a long time' before finally realizing the need to seek professional help, the left-hander emphasized on the importance of opening up and said, "As sportspeople, you pride yourself on being mentally strong and ruthless, all the attributes that lead to competitive performance.

“But when you have a weakness in you, you don't really want to open up to it. You always want to show that you are strong. The quicker you open up the quicker you will get the support and the help."

“The signs that you can spot in other people in a dressing room is if they are very isolated and don't engage with the whole team. On away trips, if you are going for team meals, are they just going back to their room and ordering room service? It's really important when you feel down that you engage with other human beings and you speak to other people about it. Once a cricketer gets isolated, they are signs that you really should look after that person,” he added.

Panesar, who has taken 167 wickets at an average of 34.71 in 50 Tests, is eyeing a national recall and is using his experience to spread awareness among other sportsmen to tackle the mental illness and other related issues as an ambassador for PCA.