David Moyes: The replacement candidates

Sunday saw yet another abysmal performance from “Moyes Boys” at Old Trafford, with three crucial points heading down the drain after Manchester United’s 2-2 draw with Fulham. So poor was United’s performance that plenty leaving the stadium expressed a belief that the Premier League champions may now be due a ‘proper manager’ at the helm.

Replacing Moyes is now a question on many supporters lips, with some asking how the Scot can expect to keep his job when United has lost 40 per cent of home games this season. Effectively out of the race for a top four place and with it Champions League qualification, some fans now believe that United must now regroup under a new manager; one with a better understanding of the game and more tactical nous than David Moyes. It may be unlikely, but should the Glazer family fire Moyes, enter the candidates:

Guus Hiddink

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The 67-year-old Dutchman was recently fired by crazy Anzhi Makhachkala owner Suleyman Kerimov, and is thus available on the market as a short-term fix. The vastly experienced manager is known for his attacking sensibility and holds Premier League experience after leading Chelsea to an FA Cup final win in 2009 with an impressive 74 per cent win record after taking over from Luis Felipe Scolari. United couldn’t benefit from this maagerial great in the long-term as he will take over the Netherlands national side after this summer’s World Cup.

Likelihood: 7/10Rant score: 10/10Current job: UnemployedHistory: PSV Eindhoven, Fenerbahçe, Valencia, Netherlands, Real Madrid, Real Betis, South Korea, Australia, Russia, Chelsea, Turkey, Anzhi Makhachkala

Giovanni Trapattoni

The 74-year-old Italian is still going strong, proving like United’s former manager that age really is a state of mind. Trapattoni is available after the leaving is post as manager of the Republic of Ireland in September. A great player in the sixties with AC Milan, Trapattoni speaks four languages – with certain charming mistakes – and is one of the most decorated managers in history. He has won 10 league titles – in four countries – and all three major European club titles. Perhaps the fiery Italian could transform United’s season?

Likelihood: 5/10Rant score: 6/10Current job: UnemployedHistory: Milan, Juventus, Inter, Bayern Munich, Cagliari, Fiorentina, Italy, Benfica, Stuttgart, Salzburg, Republic of Ireland

Ryan Giggs

A part of the current playing squad, 40-year-old Giggs is the only active player in the world who holds every single coaching badge available including the UEFA Pro Elite badge. Could the most decorated player in world football begin his managerial career as United’s version of Pep Guardiola? Certainly his peers would respect Giggs many times more than they seem to respect United’s current manager. And perhaps Giggs would do the sensible thing and hire a few decent coaches to help him out at Carrington!

Likelihood: 9/10Rant score: 6/10Current job: Player-coach, Manchester UnitedHistory: Manchester United

Laurent Blanc

Former United fan favourite ‘Larry White’ is a keen student of the game and has already shaken up the French league by winning the title with underdog Bordeaux in 2009 – much like Sir Alex Ferguson did with Aberdeen thirty years ago in Scotland. The 48-year-old, nicknamed Le Président, would relish the chance to manage United, but won’t come cheap as he is under contract with mega-rich Paris Saint-Germain.

Likelihood: 2/10Rant score: 9/10Current job: Paris Saint-GermainHistory: Bordeaux, France, Paris Saint-Germain

Slaven Bilic

Charismatic Croatian rock ‘n’ roll manager Bilic speaks fluent English and holds a law degree. Bilic spent six years as manager of Croatia and has a record of inspiring his teams, while offering few dire excuses. After a successful stint as national team manager he is perhaps ready for the step up to a bigger challenge having frequently been linked to jobs in England.

Likelihood: 1/10Rant score: 5/10Current job:History: Hajduk Split, Croatia, Lokomotiv Moscow, Be?ikta?

Ole Gunnar Solskjær

Ole has set about charming the Sky Sports presenters, is highly focused and chews gum incessantly on the sidelines during matches. Does the Babyfaced Assassin remind you of anybody? Finally back in the Premier League, where he surely belongs, there are few willing to bet against Solskjær achieving at least relative success with Cardiff City. Named Olegend by his peers in the Old Trafford dressing room, the 40-year-old would love to take charge of United.

Likelihood: 2/10Rant score: 7/10Current job: Cardiff CityHistory: Molde, Cardiff City

Jurgen Klopp

Klopp holds a diploma in Sport Science and a liking for heavy metal – just a couple of the master motivator’s traits. There’s never a dull moment around with Brick Top, and neither with his attacking Borussia Dortmund side. Klopp secured two league titles on the trot in 2011 and 2012, which is a phenomenal achievement given just how many players Dortmand have lost in recent years, including to hated rivals Bayern Munich. Fed up with the German press’ favouritism of Munich, and a lack of funds to keep his players – such as Japanese playmaker Shinji Kagawa – Klopp could yet be tempted to take the reigns at United.

Likelihood: 4/10Rant score: 9/10Current job: Borussia DortmundHistory: 1. FSV Mainz 05, Borussia Dortmund

Jupp Heynckes

The German genius managed to get ego-centric players such as Arjen Robben and Franck Ribery tp honour their defensive duties at Bayern Munich, with the side claiming a treble in Heynckes’ last season with the club. Heynckes was a marvellous striker in his pomp in the ’70s, winning both the European Championship and the World Cup. Now 68-years-old, Heynckes deserves another stint at the very top even though Munich wanted somebody younger. Let the Bavarians’ loss be United’s gain!

Likelihood: 5/10Rant score: 9/10Current job: RetiredHistory: Borussia Mönchengladbach, Bayern Munich, Athletic Bilbao, Eintracht Frankfurt, Tenerife, Real Madrid, Benfica, Schalke 04, Bayer Leverkusen

Eric Cantona

Mr. Cool would do anything for United and therein lies at least one problem: there’s little chance Ed Woodward and the Glazer family would sanction free bird Cantona’s appointment as boss. Imagine what Eric might publicly say about the club’s state of affairs and the bean-counters in charge? And picture Luis Suarez back at Old Trafford in March, with Eric once literally kicking racism out of football! Eric was most recently sporting director at the New York Cosmos, but has said that he’d love to manage United. At least fans could expect some impressive attacking displays!

Likelihood: 1/10Rant score: 9/10Current job: UnemployedHistory: France (beach), New York Cosmos (Director of Soccer)

Sir Alex Ferguson

“I enjoy watching them play”, said United’s former manager of his former players. But how long can the Master sit tight and watch his successor ruin 27 years of hard work? Sir Alex is still very much active, and has travelled to almost all of United’s away games this season, in addition to holding a book tour, a lecture tour and giving countless interviews. Ferguson’s energy and enthusiasm will seemingly never diminish. Please come back, Sir, United might need you more now than we did in 1986!

Likelihood: 3/10Rant score: 10/10Current job: RetiredHistory: East Stirlingshire, St. Mirren, Aberdeen, Manchester United

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Edited by Staff Editor