This Sunday, September 11th, Backlash returns to The Network, and we’re getting a new Smackdown Tag Team and a new Smackdown Women’s Champ. Pretty exciting for a Backlash. We got AJ headlining and a heated feud between The Miz and Dolph Ziggler. We got Naomi’s fun as hell entrance and Mojo’s hype. We got a couple days so I’ll probably change my mind 9 times before the pre-show kickoff, then 3 during the pre-show kickoff. I’m stoked, more so than usual for a Backlash.
If my brain goo was a pro wrestling match, it would be Hope vs Reality. Hope, the desperate babyface looking for just that one moment of glory, and Reality, the jerk heel that never lets me win and I suspect they’re cheating but the stupid ref keeps missing it.
So let’s quickly move onto seeing me have all my dreams shattered and get it over with....
1- Bray Wyatt vs Randy Orton
Hope
Bray gets a win. I love Bray so much and it is breaking my heart that he’s going absolutely nowhere. Even his promos are slipping. He’s still one of the best in the world but if he’s not focused, neither am I. This is a great opportunity to get The Wyatt Family back in full force.
Luke Harper makes a surprise return, Erick Rowan puts the ‘You’re Next’ mask back on, and we go to town with rest of the roster. If Championship belts and wins and losses don’t matter to them, make it terror. Wipe out everyone and build the scariest team ever into the favorites at Survivor Series. Have Kane and Baron Corbin join the ranks, or maybe The Ascension can team up with them, I don’t think they’re busy.
Reality
Randy will get the win because he took a Brock Lesnar to the head and lost his big return match after being gone for so long. And because Bray doesn’t care, I'm starting not to, as well. Follow the detached buzzards?
2- Intercontinental Championship: The Miz (c) vs Dolph Ziggler
Hope
I want The Miz to win this more than anything else on this whole card. He’s on fire as the most legitimate bad guy on the roster. If he keeps the belt, he not only adds to his growing heat with the fans but he also makes the IC belt seem even harder to get, especially from a foe as formidable as Ziggler.
I love DZ a bunch, but he can take a loss here because, well, that’s what Ziggler does. He makes his opponent look fantastic by eating spectacular dirt. Stopping Mizzle’s forward anger momentum now would be a huge waste. Miz has to win.
Reality
I think Miz does get the win, but if he wins due to Maryse’s interference or not is the question. With it, he continues on as the heel we deserve. Without, it strengthens him as a good wrestler. Which takes away from his general crappiness and makes him look good. That’s the heel we want, and we shouldn’t always get what we want.
3- Tag Team Tournament Finals: The Usos vs Hype Bros -----> N/A vs Rhyno & Heath Slater
Hope
Save the offsite trailer segment a couple weeks ago, Rhyno and Slater have been fantastic. Rhyno just eats chips, bleeds, and Gores people, while Slater is continuing his goofball ways. These guys work well together as a team too. I want them to win and I want them to name themselves One Man Gore (OMG!) and give me credit.
Reality
The Usos beat the Hype Bros and I’m honestly surprised Mojo Ryder got past the first round. The Vaudevillains or Breezango deserve this spot way more, but I guess Ryder is well liked this week. Then the Usos will beat OMG! to continue their evil upswing and we’ll be stuck with another month of Slater being in this already tiresome Will They Sign Him? storyline and I’ll yell at Hannibal Buress, my pet fish, about how Heath deserves better.
4- Smackdown Women’s Championship: Nikki Bella, Becky Lynch, Carmella, Alexa Bliss, Naomi, Natalya
Hope
Naomi. She has a rad entrance, she’s fun and she is by far the crispest wrestler in the entire company. Watch her closely next time she wrestles. It’s gorgeous when she hits all her moves like when Goldust hits a perfect Final Cut. Or take Alexa Bliss. She has a wider range of acting and emotion just in her face, and she’s getting better.. She’s probably not ready but it wouldn’t break my heart if she was the first champ in her division, on her show.
I would also like this to be the end of the promo into promo into promo thing they’ve been doing since the brand split in lieu of actual stories.
Reality
Becky Lynch is the most popular and probably most ready to handle it, so she’s going to win. Which is fine, but it’s boring. Nikki and Carmella already have a built-in feud so keep the belt off them and start showing us that creative can write two different storylines at the same time for women.
Oh no...I just realized Nattie’s gonna win because she’s the “veteran,” isn’t she. Tables will be flipped if this happens. Not mine, though, I just cleaned the apartment.
5- WWE Championship: Dean Ambrose (c) AJ Styles
Hope
Dean Ambrose retains, giving him a huge win over one of the biggest stars in the world. AJ just #beatupJohnCena. Ambrose beating Ambrose up would solidify his role as the top guy on Smackdown. It would turn him into the scrappy psycho who not only deserves to be there, but he will not go gently into that good mat.
And get him away from hiding in Christmas presents and taking people out with mustard, being taken out by exploding TVs, and all the other silly stuff that helps Renee Young sleep at night. Save AJ’s win for a bigger PPV, Backlash is already crowning 3 champions for the first time, we don’t need a fourth, because honestly, it’s just Backlash.
Reality
Aj wins, jump-starting his reign too early and diminishing Dean’s sidestep back into tough, gritty, champion. Either way, I think this match has the potential to surprise a lot of people. It may not end the way I want, but it’s gonna be a barnburner getting there.
A lot of people are focused on Shinsuke Nakamura’s Strong Style finally getting stateside, and Kevin Owens becoming the Universal Champion, but this could sneak up and get the whole world talking.
But you know what else could sneak up? John Cena, to exact revenge on AJ Styles and allow Dean Ambrose to retain his title. If anyone can make in time from Shangai, John Cena can.
What makes Sting special? His first AEW opponent opens up RIGHT HERE.
