5 WWE storylines that made no sense
Throughout its history, WWE has pulled off many successful angles. Whether it was The Rock turning heel and winning the world title at Survivor Series 1998 or the fantastic Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin 'double switch' storyline, the promotion has produced some wonderful tales over the years.
On the flip side, these are absolute stinkers... the angles and stories that were completely foolish and had no sense of rhyme or reason.
More often than not, when WWE has stretched out beyond their audience's comfort zone, the story becomes confusing or just plain silly. From The Rock 'n' Wrestling Era to the present day, World Wrestling Entertainment is known just as much for its failures as its successes.
Having said that, let's take a look at five storylines in WWE that made absolutely no sense.
#5 - A child wins the WWE RAW Tag Team Championships with Braun Strowman
There's never really been a clear-cut explanation as to why this went down the way that it did. But for at least one day, a 10-year-old was a reigning titleholder in the largest sports entertainment company in the world.
At WrestleMania 34, Braun Strowman was set to challenge The Bar for the WWE RAW Tag Team Championships, but needed a partner. He chose the young Nicholas Cone (son of WWE official John Cone). With The Monster Among Men doing all the in-ring work, he and the youngster captured the belts.
The next day, Nicholas was forced to relinquish his share of the title because he had to attend school. To this day, there's been no clear reason as to why this decision was made.
#4 - Val Venis has shrinkage
During the rise of the Attitude Era, Val Venis symbolized everything that was changing about WWE. Portraying the role of an adult film star-turned-wrestler, Venis' simple line of "Helloooo, Ladies" was a perfect catchphrase for his creepy character.
Needless to say, this led to a lot of hijinx from Val and a lot of bad puns from Jerry Lawler on commentary. It was already dumb before they added the twist that Venis was having an affair with the wife of Kai En Tai manager Yamaguchi-san.
After being apprehended by the faction, they strung Venis up with his 'manhood' on a chopping block. But just as Yamaguchi was just about to choppy-choppy that pee-pee, the lights went out. Venis later explained that there was just enough 'shrinkage' there that Little Val was able to dodge the falling blade.
Totally childish and stupid, this is the kind of thing you would normally see in Mad Magazine, not in WWE. However, in the late 90s, they were willing to try just about anything.
#3 - The Anonymous General Manager
This one comes from a pretty dark era in WWE history - the lag between John Cena's ascent to the top of the promotion up until the late 2010's.
During that time, nearly every wacky stunt you can think of seemed to pop up on RAW or SmackDown. Nothing seemed to work, least of all this angle.
From an empty podium, a faceless, nameless power had control over the show, issuing edicts via messages on a laptop. Sure, it provided the company with an easy out, or 'do-over', anytime they felt like using it. But the end result made for some very melodramatic moments.
Although there were rumors that Hornswoggle was being considered to be revealed as the GM, that never materialized. This silly story basically had no conclusion, and therefore, was a waste of time.
#2 - Bark like a dog
This one was not only foolish, it was also demeaning.
Vince McMahon made it a habit to involve himself in storylines with several of the WWE Divas like Torrie Wilson and Sable. But perhaps his worst storyline in that vein was his adventures with Trish Stratus.
The two were engaged in an onscreen love affair, only to have Mr. McMahon eventually turn on Stratus and punish her. In a disgusting display, Vince forced the eventual Hall of Famer to crawl around the ring on her hands and knees and bark like a dog.
Not only was it sickening, but it also didn't really add anything to either character. Trish was already loved by the fans and McMahon was already hated. So what was the point in all this?
#1 - Mae Young becomes pregnant and gives birth to a rubber hand
Oh Boy... Here we go.
This story may be the most ridiculous stunt that WWE has ever staged. And that's really saying something.
In what was supposed to get over Mark Henry's character of 'Sexual Chocolate', he apparently used his penile prowess to impregnate the legendary Mae Young. Never mind the fact that she was well into her 70's at the time.
Nonetheless, the stupid storyline continued on, until it was time for the 'baby' to arrive. When it did, it was revealed to be a rubber hand - something that looked like a movie prop. Everyone just laughed it off in the scene, and that was that. No explanation given, and no reason to have this kind of ridiculousness.
If this list indicates anything, it's that WWE has tried everything. Some of these insane angles were forgotten instantly while others went down in infamy. But when you're the worldwide leader in sports entertainment for several decades running, both insanity and inanity tend to become part of your lore.
Quick Links
Jacob Terrell