Sourav Ganguly has not retired yet (Satire)

Sourav Ganguly has retired from international cricket.

Sourav Ganguly has not retired from international cricket.

Sourav Ganguly wishes to play in the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly cannot play in the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly will play in the Ranji trophy.

Sourav Ganguly will play for Bengal only if he can play in the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly will play domestic cricket to stay fit for the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly is not confused.

I am.

The IPL is a domestic league.

A-ha, now it all starts to make sense.

The IPL is a domestic league with international players. It is an Indian tournament; so Ganguly should play.

The teams are owned by corporate interests who—unfortunately—are not interested in Ganguly.

Ganguly believes that non-cricketing reasons were the cause of his downfall.

“Selection is an opinion, and my non-selection is their opinion.” is what he said or lines to that effect.

Ganguly wants to play but he has no one to play with or for.

As the Hindustan Times editorial puts it—very succinctly:

“Even before his ‘retraction’, the Ponce of Kolkata had clearly stated that he doesn’t “see any point in playing competitive cricket again”. Pointlessness, some may argue, is besides the point when announcing one’s discontinuation or otherwise of a job. As he stated with great theological dexterity a few hours after making his initial comment, Ganguly, if he gets “an opportunity to play IPL”, will continue to “play domestic cricket to stay fit”. Something that may, now come to think of it, apply to Sunil Gavaskar, Kapil Dev and even the old blighter Bishan Singh Bedi.”

Superman exits the stage but retains a foot in the door.

Only Sourav Ganguly could say and do something like this. No one but Ganguly.