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One of the most effective abilities you can develop to have an authentic life is to manage your emotions. Whether we're stuck in traffic, dealing with a challenging coworker, or fighting with a loved one, we have all experienced times when our emotions get the better of us.
The reason for that is frequently because we weren't aware of what was occurring till we were too far along the emotional train to stop it. Without knowing ways to manage our emotions, we often say things we come to regret later.
If you can't control your emotions, you won't be able to recognize them or deal with them till it's too late. With some work, it's feasible to learn how to efficiently control your emotions. For instance, numerous studies suggest that empathy can be taught as a skill and is not necessarily an inborn trait.
How to Manage Your Emotions
Emotion regulation is now recognized as one of the primary life skills. From a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) perspective, our thoughts determine our emotions, which dictate our behavior, so you need to learn ways to manage your emotions.
Here's a look at six such ways:
1) Self-Regulation
The ability to experience your thoughts, feelings, and emotions and decide how to react in a way that's beneficial to both you and others is known as self-regulation.
Learning how to manage your emotions is an art. Research, including a study in 2020, has demonstrated that self-regulation develops through your bond with your major carers during childhood.
In actuality, we lack the ability to comfort ourselves from birth. Co-regulation is the process by which our carers' nervous systems help us regain equilibrium. Adults and teenagers who do not grow up in a nurturing atmosphere often find it challenging to control their emotions. Don't give up if you recognize yourself as one of them, as there're many effective techniques to address that.
2) Focus On Your Breath
We experience a fight-or-flight response when we witness something upsetting, which causes our breathing to become rapid and shallow. That increases our anxiety and gives our emotions more traction.
According to research, deep, slow breathing stimulates the vagus nerve, which emerges from the brain and regulates the parasympathetic nervous system, which in turn regulates the relaxation response. Take a few slow, deep breaths to relax.
3) Put It Down On Paper
We can better comprehend our lives, keep track of our development, and, certainly, make better decisions by writing down our feelings and thoughts. Writing down our emotions can assist us in gaining a new perspective, especially if we're at a crossroads in life or have been through a painful event.
Even if it doesn't make you feel better right away, journaling is a tried-and-true type of treatment. As a way to manage your emotions, you get some alone time; it's free, and you can go back and clarify your ideas later.
4) Learn to Accept Your Emotions
We categorize feelings as "negative" or "bad" far too frequently. If you're already feeling emotional, that can add another layer of guilt or shame. You might find it more beneficial to approach your emotions from a point of inquiry as opposed to judgment.
This technique of letting emotions flow in and out like the tide is referred to as the observer perspective. It can be helpful to think to yourself, "Isn't that interesting? " as you become aware of your emotions rising.
The idea is to recognize the wave and let it pass. Imagine you're the surfer, and you're flowing and learning to manage your emotions.
5) Be Conscious Of Your Body
Feel your feet on the ground, and twitch your toes as a way to manage your emotions. If you're seated in a chair, feel your hips in the seat's support. If you're standing, slightly bend your knees.
Become conscious of your body's sensations, and visualize holding the emotions and sensations as they pass through your body. Regular exercise relieves tension and can assist in managing emotions as they arise.
6) Meditation
It has been demonstrated that practicing meditation can alter brain tissue. The brain is neuroplastic, which means depending on how we utilize it, it can develop, change, and adapt. By doing so, you will be able to manage your emotions.
According to a 2019 study, among other benefits, meditating for 13 minutes per day for eight weeks boosted people's mood and emotional control. If meditation is not your thing, you can seek other alternatives, including yoga, tai chi, gardening, and forest bathing.
Takeaway
Emotional regulation does not mean suppressing or ignoring your emotions. Learning to manage your emotions, though, requires accepting them as a natural part of who you are. The key to emotional mastery is to approach your emotions with curiosity.
If you let them, your emotions can tell you a lot about who you are. You should never let your emotions lead you astray. A wonderful way to sabotage honest communication with both yourself and others is to believe that anything you feel is bad or negative. When you manage your emotions, you manage yourself
