The Best and Worst of Footballing Beards 2016

Tim Howard’s Beard is truly a work of Art
Modified 08 Sep 2016

Facial hair trend has transcended to become a permanent form of Male expression. Let’s face it, the beard trend is here to stay and every Tom, Dick and Harry is trying to grow one, including Footballers who have found a niche for growing a beard themselves. Let’s take a look the Best and Worst of Footballing Beards of the year.   

The Best

Tim Howard

The American Goalkeeper’s long thatch of curly chin foliage can not only stop goals but can also be used as a storage device for his keys and his iPhone. Although he didn’t start too often for Everton last season, he did manage to make this list. The former Everton Goalkeeper has kept alive the US Soccer tradition of funky beards just like Alexi Lalas did back in the 90’s.

His beard is truly a work of art given it was displayed in a Beard exhibition in London. Barack Obama once suggested him to shave off his beard so that he can avoid being mobbed by fans after his heroic displays at the 2014 World Cup.

James Collins

james collins
Don’t mess with this Wildling

James Collins' beard might be the reason he is defending so exceptionally for West Ham this season, maybe beards have magical powers? The Welshman’s imposing beard is enough to derail any striker running towards the goal. In fact, Collin’s ginger beard is so bright and sparkly his teammates wear shades inside the locker rooms.

If James Collins ever decides to hang up his boots, he can always join the cast of the Vikings series. His ginger beard also reminds us of a certain wildling character from Game of Thrones. Any guesses?

Joe Allen

Joe Allen’s beard is truly blessed

Joe Allen grew a beard, became a cult hero and has now been sold by Liverpool. Well, Red’s loss is Stoke’s gain, in fact, the Potter’s fans have already made up pre-match prayers which go like, Joe Allen, Who art in midfield, hallowed be thy beard.

Growing a beard seemed to have had a positive effect in Joe Allen’s performances for Wales this year as fans couldn't get enough of the player who was given many nicknames like “Welsh Pirlo” and most recent being “Jesus”.

Apart from growing a beard, the Welshman enjoys spending time at his coop saving hens who can't produce eggs anymore. Joe definitely pulls off the beard quite well.

Joe Ledley

Joe Ledley
Joe Ledley looks like a Viking in disguise

Sadly Wales never made it to the Euro finals but Ledley did manage to end up in our final list. Joe Ledley, perhaps, sports the meanest Viking beard in football. Imagine meeting this guy on a battlefield with an axe in one hand a shield in the other and one of those horned helmet heading towards you.

You would definitely start running the other way. Although Ledley might not be the best footballer around but he does have an awesome beard. He definitely needs to consider insuring it. What is with the Welsh and their gorgeous beards?

Xabi Alonso

xabi alonso
Xabi Alonso’s beard is the definition of “Class”

Xabi Alonso probably sports the neatest face furniture of all the footballers in the world. The beloved ex-red and current midfield lynchpin of Bayern Munich represents pure class. Alonso’s beard is always trim, tidy, perfectly groomed and manicured while still maintains his badass image. It’s official nothing can be better than Xabi Alonso's beard.

Quique Sánchez Flores

Quique’s beard is Suaveness personified

It is a real shame that Watford FC sacked the Spanish manager with the beautiful salt and pepper beard, even after helping the team stay afloat in the Premier League. It is hard to believe that the 51-year-old has a 16-year-old daughter, 14-year-old namesake son and 12-year-old twins and still manages to look so young.

The Premier League will be an uglier place without the beautiful beard of Quique Sanchez Flores, along with his endless stylish Zara outfits, which will be sorely missed as well. And Quique also has a strong resemblance to Hugh Laurie from the Tv series House,M.D.

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Published 07 Sep 2016
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