Where is Jeffrey Dahmer's stepmother Shari now and what was her role in the Milwaukee cannibal's life?

Milwaukee serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer's stepmother, Shari Dahmer, married Jeffrey's father, Lionel Dahmer, in 1978 after Lionel divorced his first wife, as per The Cinemaholic. She had previously said on Dahmer on Dahmer that she felt responsible for Jeffrey as a mother, among many other things. Shari is currently believed to be living with her husband in Ohio.

In Netflix's new Jeffrey Dahmer series, Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story, she is portrayed by actress Molly Ringwald. The series, which dropped on September 21, 2022, delves deep into Jeffrey Dahmer's life and unveils some of the most gruesome stories pertaining to his crimes.

Although not explored in detail, her character does make a brief but memorable appearance on the show. Without further ado, keep reading to find out Shari Dahmer's role in Jeffrey's life, her current whereabouts, and more.

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Shari Dahmer's role in Jeffrey Dahmer's life, her thoughts on his behavior, and more details

Shari and Lionel Dahmer got married in 1978, following the divorce of Lionel and his ex-wife, Joyce Flint. According to The Cinemaholic, Shari first met Jeffrey at his mother Flint's house, where he was living alone.

At the time, Jeffrey was 18 years old. In the Oxygen documentary, titled Dahmer for Dahmer, Shari spoke about what she felt about Jeffrey Dahmer. She mentioned that he was ''vulnerable'' and that she wanted to ''mother'' him. Shari said (obtained via Distractify),

''What I wanted to do, and what most people wanted to do, was mother him. He was just vulnerable. Even if I wasn’t his stepmother all his life, as a mother you sense those things.''

In an interview with Larry King in 2004, Shari spoke at length about Jeffrey Dahmer's state of mind after his parents' divorce and his mother left the house. She said,

''He was embarassed and ashamed that his parents were divorced..He didn't want his friends to know, he witheld his true feelings. He was very good at disguising his feelings, but he was ashamed and embarassed.''

She further stated,

''When his mother left, and he wanted to stay behind, he became very lonely, and that's when the first murder occured.''

Shari mentioned in the same interview that she noticed Jeffrey's drinking problem early on. She said that when she came home one day, Jeffrey was passed out on the bed, inebriated. She described her stepson as a ''closet alcoholic,'' which, according to her, was the ''only thing that flagged.''

Shari said that apart from his drinking problems, she didn't find anything alarming about his behavior that suggested a much darker side underneath. She, along with her husband, would often go visit Jeffrey in his Milwaukee apartment, which she described as ''perfectly clean'' and ''spotless.''

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Shari Dahmer's current whereabouts

As per Distractify, Shari Dahmer, 81, continues to live with her husband, Lionel, in Seville, Ohio. She and her husband stood by Jeffrey throughout the trial. However, the stepmother did not defend Jeffrey's actions and mentioned in a rare news interview (added above) that she doesn't have sympathy but feels empathy for her stepson.

She said in the interview that Jeffrey is mentally ill, and that a ''part of his soul died years ago.'' Shari further added,

''We must look into what he has done and why he has done it. So, again, if we understand more about Jeff and empathize only in what created this monster, then perhaps we can in fact help prevent the monsters in others.''

Shari and her husband do not have any kids together. She reportedly stayed in touch with Jeffrey Dahmer after his conviction, until he was killed by a fellow inmate in 1994 at the Columbia Correctional Institution.

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You can watch Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story on Netflix.