"I was on my own, cast as the villain" - Chris Cairns on horrible match-fixing allegations against him 

Former New Zealand all-rounder Chris Cairns went through a torrid time in his personal life over the past few months. The 51-year-old was on life support and was paralyzed from below the waist after suffering a stroke during one of his four open-heart surgeries last year. Following that, he was diagnosed with bowel cancer earlier this year.

However, after a near-death experience, Cairns has been recovering well and he believes the past few months have made him mentally stronger.

Chris Cairns was accused of being a part of match-fixing scandals and from 2012 to 2015, suffered a lot on many fronts until he was proved not guilty.

Speaking on a podcast hosted by NZME, Chris Cairns described how those high-profile trials had affected his mind. But due to his recent health battles, he believes his outlook on life has changed.

“I harbored a lot of anger and frustration, but I carried that silently," he said. "I dug my hole in Australia and got on with life ... but I was angry. But now, after the last seven months, it’s so far down my thinking. It’s not a priority. It seems like another time, another place."

However, Cairns is also of the opinion that those accusations helped him toughen up for what was to come later in his life.

“Maybe during that time it (the match-fixing trials) built up the steel in me that allowed me to survive what I went through - because it was about survival at that time," he said. "I was on my own, cast as the villain, that was my role. Building that resilience up, who’s to say that wasn’t a contributing factor in helping me fight.”

"You have to stand up for what you believe" - Chris Cairns on Lalit Modi's accusations

It was former IPL commissioner Lalit Modi who had accused Chris Cairns of being involved in match-fixing scandals. However, Cairns successfully proved the accusations wrong.

Although it took time for that to happen and it eventually affected his cricketing career, Cairns does not regret taking the matter to the court.

“No, you have to stand up for what you believe," he said. "Lalit did his thing by firing that (tweet) off. He was the most influential name in the game of cricket and the unintended consequence of that set things in motion. If you had asked me that question in July of last year, I know there would be a different response.”

Cairns is the seventh-highest wicket-taker for New Zealand in Tests with 218 scalps to his name.