How the final day of the 2016-17 Premier League season could pan out
A Liverpool fan's account of how this Premier League season could pan out.
With Steven Gerrard’s recent cryptic Instagram post, rumours have been swirling around about how Liverpool’s most iconic captain might make a return to the shores of Mersey. With Klopp confirming that ‘He is always so welcome at Liverpool’, one can only hope. With that in mind, here’s a possible breakdown of how things will pan out on the last day of the season.
After a thrilling season with its fair share of ups and downs, heartbreak and exhilaration it has all come down to the final day. The title race has boiled down to three teams, Manchester City, Manchester United and Liverpool.
The end of the 2016-17 premiership season is in sight, who will be crowned champions?
21 May 2017. Anfield. The final game of the season against Middlesbrough, who are mired in a relegation scrap for survival. They need just a point to avoid the drop.
The top of the table looks something like this:
Manchester City (+62 GD), Manchester United (+65 GD) and Liverpool (+63 GD) are all level on points with 82.
There has been some crushing news for Liverpool fans:
Loris Karius who has been simply astounding this season, keeping 20 clean sheets has accidentally punched a wall out of anger at Roberto Firmino’s fashion sense and broken his hand; Simon Mignolet is in goal for the crucial game. Will he be the saviour?
When it rains, it pours:
Liverpool are 3-0 down at halftime courtesy an Alvaro Negredo hat-trick; can they pull off another Istanbul?
In the 50th minute, Jordan Henderson gets bull tackled by Chilean pitbull Gary Medel, who forced through a transfer from Inter Milan to Middlesbrough because he decided the colour red-suited him better. Henderson is severely injured and has to be stretchered off.
Medel gets away with just a caution; Liverpool fans are not hiding their dissent. Every touch of the ball is now greeted with choruses of ‘You’re just a fat Sergio Aguero’. It’s clearly affecting his play.
Here’s some news that will definitely cheer the crowd up:
Steven Gerrard who made a phenomenal comeback to Liverpool after his LA Galaxy stint, takes the armband from Henderson. You get the feeling this was written in the stars.
There was been much more tempo to Liverpool’s play now:
Liverpool need four goals to clinch the Premier League title, their play has much more purpose about it now. Steven Gerrard is pinging those crossfield passes just like the old days.
Liverpool are probing Middlesbrough for a way back into the game:
68’: Sadio Mane gets fouled in the box, penalty given!
69’: Gerrard steps up to the plate and absolutely belts it into the top corner!
75’: Coutinho does his trademark cut in from the left onto his right foot and curls an unstoppable one beyond Victor Valdes’ grasp. They need two more!
81’: Daniel Sturridge who was last seen skulking and hissing miserably at Liverpool fans as he worked his warmup comes on for Firmino. The impact is immediate! He chips Valdes for a goal and equalises! They need just one more to achieve the unthinkable.
They’ve gone and mucked it up again!
85’: Negredo is chopped down in the box by an overenthusiastic James Milner, penalty given!
85’: He steps up for his fourth.
Mignolet, the savior!
Mignolet, who’s always claimed that Colombian firebrand Rene Higuita is hero, miraculously does a front-flip and saves it with his back! What a sight! Anfield is bouncing.
It’s the deep end of the game now, and things are getting very tense.
88’: Mane is running up the field with the ball like a pack of hellhounds are after him; he gets stopped in the wings by Ayala.
90’: The power struggle continues for a good 2 mins, with Mane trying endless step-overs and feints. Nail-biting stuff.
91’: Ayala decides this isn’t going anywhere, but Mane manages to find the space to cross it in only for the ball to get knocked away by a boro head.
The threads of fate have untangled; the ball falls to Gerrard 30 yards out.
He hammers it home! GERRARD YOU BEAUTY!
The long shot drifts across the ground, nutmegs two Boro players and rises into the top left corner.
Anfield erupts! Lovren kicks the ball into the stands to end the game at 93’.
Has the long wait for the Premier League title finally come to an end for Liverpool?
YES, IT HAS!
City end their game 2-1 with Isaac Success heading in a 94’ goal.
United have made a meal of it against Crystal Palace, drawing 2-2, with Rooney now a reinvented center-back scoring 2 own goals; they go to 83 points. Their title dreams have been shattered. Mourinho blames the rest of the team for not providing the requisite moral support to Rooney in his time of need.
Here’s how the final table looks like:
|2|Manchester City |38|27|4|7|101|38|+63|85|
For some, this heartbreak is only the beginning:
Journalists are eagerly typing up the next day’s headlines. Expect a lot along the lines of ‘Pep Guardiola fraud’, ‘Pep Guardiola finally found out’ after only managing to win three of the four trophies available to him.
The Premier League trophy is now being handed out:
All the squad jumps up onto to the podium, the wait for the championship has ended after 27 long years.
Steven Gerrard is to lift up the trophy. But, wait! A one legged Jordan Henderson limps across the pitch in crutches to the podium. The legend takes off the armband and hands it over to Henderson. The feels are real.
They both put their hands on the trophy; the camera pans back to when Stevie lifted the Champion League back in 2005. The pair thrust the trophy into the air, red confetti erupts everywhere. There are flares as far as the eye can see. Anfield is roaring and cheering.
Post-game, Gerrard announces his retirement from the game with his illustrious trophy cabinet finally complete. Jurgen Klopp signs another contract that keeps him at LFC for a further 6 years with an optional extension of 25 years.
The city of Liverpool is in a party-mode!
Rave party at Adam Lallana’s place. Klopp was sleepy, so he didn’t want to host it.
Alonso, Carra, Redknapp, Dalglish, Agger, Kuyt, Bellamy, Finnan, Hyppia, Arbeloa, Fowler, Crouch, Aurelio, Babel, Baros, Torres, Biscan, Berger, Yossi and anyone and everyone with an affiliation to LFC was invited.
Michael Owen was locked out for being a ****.
And the good news keeps on coming:
Next day, the signing of Marco Reus is announced. The next month, Luis Suarez announces his comeback. Claims he always wanted to finish career at ‘Greatest club in the world’ and LFC has always been ‘The club of my heart’.
Everything is good again and the rose tinted glasses seem genuine this time around.
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