Satire: 5 reasons Manchester United can still win the UEFA Champions League this season

#1 It doesn't matter

What Sevilla don't understand is that nothing matters

So what if they don't win the Champions League?

Millions and millions of years later, when the universe is engulfed in flame by the bursting of our sun and the inevitable heat death of the universe occurs, nobody is going to remember that United lost to Sevilla in the RO16 of the 2017-18 UEFA Champions League.

What they will remember are the 2012-13 EPL win and the 2007-08 UEFA Champions League win and the 2016-17 Europa league title or more importantly, the 2016 Community Shield. History matters so much more than the present, and the sooner the fans realise it, the happier they will be.

William Shakespeare put it best:

"Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,

That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,

And then is heard no more. It is a tale

Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,

Signifying nothing."

Nothing matters. Especially when the team we support doesn't win.

Disclaimer: "This is a piece of fiction written for humorous purposes and should be taken in jest"