We’ve now had a couple of night’s sleep since the equal parts awful, bizarre and hilarious House of Horrors match at WWE Payback 2017. While there are many articles across the internet retrospectively discussing people’s reactions to the match, I felt it was appropriate to share some of the thoughts that went through my own mind while watching it live. Here are 5 of the most notable ones!
#1 Was that Bray’s actual house?
Since arriving at the WWE a few years back, the Wyatt family seem to have moved houses a fair few times. At one point, they were located in a swamp-like area with crocodiles and other aqua based predators roaming around. Bray would sit there on his rocking chair, looking out over the water, chuckling to himself while the rest of the family walked around in masks, staring into the camera.
Then we had the more recent Wyatt accommodation where Sister Abigail was meant to be buried. Perhaps these are the same places; it’s not really clear. But we never did find out about the fate of the crocodiles. Perhaps Bray had them all turned into boots, which seems a little unfair.
After Randy unhelpfully burnt Bray’s house to the ground, the family were forced to move again, this time to somewhere seemingly close to the SAP Centre in San Jose. The Samoa Joe Vs, Seth Rollins match probably lasted close to 20 minutes, so that would have given Bray at least half an hour to get to the arena in Randy’s car. Bray is usually billed as coming from Lafayette, Louisianna, which definitely would not have allowed him to reach San Jose in that time.
Presumably, then, this was not his principal residence, but a temporary accommodation he had built for the purposes of the match. Does that mean Bray travels the country erecting scary houses in every state just to get his kicks? That’s a pretty terrifying thought itself.
#2 Why did the tractor roll backwards?
After seeing Randy emerge from the Limo at Bray’s ‘house’, hopes were somewhat high that we were going to be getting a WWE version of the Final Deletion match between Jeff and Matt Hardy on TNA. That match expertly walked the precarious line between absurd and realistic. Yes, things were pretty odd looking, and Matt’s behaviour alone was enough to make a lesser man run for the hills, but in WWE’s version, it’s safe to say the bizarre won out.
For example, we got an early glimpse of what can only be described as Bray’s magic powers. Whether he has the power of telekinesis, or something different altogether, remains to be discovered, but he had somehow managed to get a tractor to move across Randy’s path without touching it, which seemed to confuse Randy more than anything
Now, if you have the mental capabilities to move a tractor without physical contact, presumably you can do something better than just casually rolling it backwards across your opponent’s path. Why didn’t he drive the tractor straight at Orton in the hope of taking out one of his legs? At the very least this would have put Randy on the defensive straight away and had him feeling terrified at the thought of other inanimate objects attacking him at any moment.
#3 Why were there cut scenes?
The way the match was introduced and spoken about by the commentators, you got the impression that the WWE wanted you to think this was live footage. Initially, the camera work was pretty well done, peering over Orton’s shoulder as he approached the house.
We got a glimpse of Bray through the window looking like he was taken unawares at Randy’s arrival – did he not hear the car pull up outside? And while the illusion of ‘live footage’ was already broken by this point, we could have at least put it down to multiple cameras following Randy, and somebody back in the editing team cutting to different lenses as the action went on.
But as soon as Orton entered the house, the WWE decided to do what it does best and take things too far. The footage cut to scary looking drawings on the wall and close-ups of Bray’s household objects. You heard laughing and Bray’s own creepy voice instructing Randy to ‘run!’.
Why would he want Orton to run away if he was trying to lure the Viper in for the kill? Bray was clearly sending out mixed messages here, like that girl at school you were always pursuing who never actually told you she wasn’t interested. I suppose Bray is meant to be insane after all, so we can let this one slide.
But the cut scenes were just unnecessary, to say the least. We know Bray says ‘run’ a lot, and we are aware this is supposed to be a house full of horrors, but surely a better way of building up the aura around the place would have been to just follow the camera around the different rooms, letting the viewing audience come across the bizarre doll heads and strange pagan constructions ourselves. WWE just can’t help talking down to its fans!
Also read: 5 Botches, slip-ups and outrageous moments from WWE Payback 2017
#4 What was meant by the blue and red lighting?
So, when Randy arrived at the house, it was caked in blue light. This was pretty cool as it reminded me of the early days of The Undertaker when he used to eerily float around the backstage with Paul Bearer with different shades of dark blue light upon his face. Something was chilling about a bright blue house in the middle of the darkness, and Randy certainly was taken aback by it.
But then the fight happened, and Bray managed to get the better of his opponent, burying him under the fridge. What are we meant to take from that, by the way? Is the fridge the true symbol of horror in Bray’s house? Nevermind the doll heads and gardening tools lying around, the contents of the Wyatt family’s fridge seems to be the actual thing we should avoid. I know from being a student that a refrigerator can easily be the scariest thing in a house!
Anyway, after Orton was seemingly incapacitated, Bray stumbled to the car with enough time to stretch out his arms and turn the house a bright red colour. What did this mean? My initial thought was related to things I am aware of about Amsterdam, but perhaps we won’t go there!
Maybe the red was to signal the match was over, but then we had already heard the fight had to end in the ring. Perhaps it was to signify the colour of blood. Orton had been vanquished in a bloody, refrigerated mess. Whatever the reason for the colour change, know that when you’re going to visit Bray’s house, blue presumably means ‘come in’, and when everything turns red, that’s Bray signalling for you to go home.
Also read: Best and Worst of WWE Payback 2017
#5 Was Jinder the ultimate ‘horror’?
I will give the WWE credit for one thing. Although the objects of ‘horror’ in Bray’s temporary accommodation were pretty lame, the match did end with something truly horrifying: the sight of Jinder Mahal holding the WWE Championship.
Once we get past the fact that in a match concept he had invented, Bray could not defeat his opponent without the help of somebody totally unrelated to anything; we can more clearly see what the WWE was trying to convey by this match’s conclusion. This is how I interpreted it anyway:
Yes, you all may claim to love professional wrestling, and no doubt have tremendous respect for what WWE have done over the years. You have seen a group of truly great, talented individuals with the company’s main belt around their waist. Guys like Hulk Hogan, Macho Man Randy Savage, Shawn Michaels, Bret Hart, Stone Cold and The Rock have all, in their own ways, made that belt feel like the huge, important deal that it is.
Now, as we enter 2017, and most of you are too busy watching independent shows like ROH and NJPW and not even bothering to pay for our content anymore, we’re willing to throw the championship on the first person we could think of just to teach you a lesson! If you thought severed dolls heads and creepy vignettes were all we had in mind for the night, you were sadly mistaken. Get used to hearing the following announcement: ‘and NEEEWWWW WWE Champion, Jinder Mahal!’ – The thought is enough to keep anybody up at night.
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