"You're very young" — Family or Fiancé relationship expert Tracy comments on Kiva and Tobias' decision to marry

Family or Fiancé season 4 aired episode 7 on June 7, 2025. The segment focused on Kiva and Tobias, a couple of young adults who were engaged to marry in less than a month. While their families protested against their decision, wondering why they could not wait longer, Kiva and Tobias wished to prove them wrong. Relationship expert Tracy McMillan expressed a similar concern.

When Tracy sat down with the couple to learn more about them, she discovered they were in their early 20s — Kiva was 23 and Tobias was 22. Consequently, considering their age, she voiced her concern about their decision to get married.

"You're very young to be taking such a huge step," she said.

Kiva agreed, saying she had heard similar comments from several others, including their family members. However, she was confident in her choice, adding that her life with Tobias was meant to be. However, the Family or Fiancé expert remained skeptical, stating that people often said that and acted on emotions instead of thinking logically about their current and future situations.

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"You moved in really fast" — Family or Fiancé star Tracy worries about the pace of Kiva and Tobias' relationship

As the meeting progressed, Family or Fiancé star Tobias shared that he dated Kiva for a "few months" before asking her to marry him. Although it was short, Tobias explained that he and Kiva utilized the time to get to know one another better and learn about their interests.

"We really had an opportunity to get into each other's spaces," Kiva added.

She then mentioned that they were supposed to live separately. However, due to her job, which was closer to Tobias' residence than her place, Kiva decided to move in with him.

Looking at how fast-paced their relationship was, Tracy said:

"You moved in really fast, you guys."

When the Family or Fiancé expert asked the two if the pace of their relationship ever worried them, they responded that it did not. Tobias explained that the experience of going from being a couple to moving in together was a "seamless" one.

Kiva added that although the entire time was not "peaches and cream," it allowed them to learn about the "nitty-gritty things" that happened in their childhood. Consequently, it helped them understand and learn more about why each of them acted the way they did.

Tracy then asked Kiva to elaborate on her children. The Family or Fiancé female cast member shared that she grew up in a split family. Kiva mentioned that she always felt the "disappointment" of her parents not being together and her having "so many siblings."

When Kiva mentioned that she had nine siblings, Tracy pointed out that it must have been difficult to have a "need met," inquiring Kiva if getting married was a reaction to that.

"No, because I got in my head early, like, 'Yes, I want life to be better.' At that point, it was becoming the woman that Kiva wanted to become," Kiva responded.

Tracy immediately noted that the Family or Fiancé star referred to herself in the third person. Kiva explained that she started speaking that way once she figured out what she wanted, and also because of the expectations she had to carry when she was younger. Consequently, she stated that she was certain her decision to marry Tobias was not mistimed.

Later in the meeting, the couple shared that they had two dates for their weddings — first, a court marriage, followed by another celebration a year later. Kiva and Tobias hoped the time between the first and second event would allow them to prepare financially. However, both Tracy and the couple's parents remained apprehensive.

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Family or Fiancé episodes air every Saturday at 8 pm ET only on OWN.