From transactional experiences to loneliness: Everything Selena Gomez has said about her touring experiences

Selena Gomez reflected on the highs and lows of touring during the August 7, 2025, episode of Therapuss with Jake Shane. The singer shared that while touring allowed her to connect with fans, it also felt isolating behind the scenes.

"I think touring is very bittersweet for me only because when you are in a band or maybe have a lot of friends with you, it can be easier. But there became a point on tour for me where I noticed that every single person around me, I was paying. So all the nice things and experiences sometimes felt very transactional and I thrive off connection," she explained.

Selena Gomez further emphasized that human connection had always been at the heart of what drove her. She said that touring often lacked that genuine bond, making it “very lonely” for her.

When Jake Shane noted that Gomez was often surrounded by people whose primary job was to get her on stage, Gomez acknowledged the difficulty in knowing if the affection she received was genuine.

"They just have to be there. It’s very hard cuz I care about people, too. So, when I extend my love, it’s it’s genuine. It’s just sometimes it’s not given to the right people," Selena Gomez added.

She admitted that she typically said no to touring offers but was open to finding “a new way of touring” that would allow her to share her music while preserving her sense of connection. For her, the greatest reward remained “being able to share” her music with “all of those people in the room with her.”

The conversation also touched on the physical toll of touring. Shane pointed out the relentless travel and lack of rest. Selena Gomez admitted to feeling the physical strain as well and said that sleeping on a bus was difficult, though she had never been a great sleeper in general.

"Back then, I had the adrenaline rush of a show, and I would come off and I would be ready to stay up till 4 in the morning, right? Doing nothing, mind you. It was just the fact that my adrenaline was like pumping through me," she explained.

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Selena Gomez discusses her song Who Says, reveals the song "is the only reason" she’d ever “tour again”

Selena Gomez (Image via Getty Images)

Speaking on the Therapuss with Jake Shane podcast, Selena Gomez singled out Who Says as her favorite track from the Selena Gomez & The Scene era. Discussing the song’s impact, she added that hearing its opening chords while performing was unlike anything else.

"So, it’s the most powerful moment when I get to perform it. That’s honestly the only reason I would ever do a tour again…if I could perform Who Says like 17 times in a row," Gomez said.

Gomez further explained why the song continued to resonate with her, making her feel an emotional high and a deep sense of joy.

"It’s such a high, and it makes me feel good, and I want other people to feel good. It’s just I’ll never forget what that message in that song means," she added.

Podcast host Jake Shane also shared a personal connection to the track. He admitted that as a child, he simply enjoyed it as “a banger,” but over time, its message took on greater significance. Listening to it “cut deep” and hit harder as an adult.

Gomez related to that evolving perspective, recalling a moment overseas when the song came on the radio about three years earlier.

"I remember just sitting there looking out the window, and I started tearing up, and I was like, why the f*ck am I tearing up to my own song…But it was because it was the little me who was there saying these really powerful messages that," Gomez explained.

Shane asked Gomez how it felt to hear her younger self say words she now needed. She said she first loved the song for its universal meaning, not body image or societal standards. With age, the lyrics gained deeper significance.

Gomez also shared that performing it live is harder now because it was recorded in a higher key, so she lowers it an octave on tours. She joked she might need to redo or recut it to fit her current range.

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Selena Gomez has been keeping busy on multiple fronts. She recently wrapped filming for the fifth season of Only Murders in the Building. The new season is premiering on September 9. Alongside her acting work, she has also been promoting the launch of Rare Beauty’s first perfume.