Kane: Life and times of the "Big Red Machine"

Do you fear the Big Red Monster, or did you chuckle at his jokes and recent stints alongside Daniel Bryan? Either way, it’s no secret that Kane is one of the most versatile superstars on WWE’s current roster. JBL calls him the “best big man in WWE”, and it’s true. Kane can go toe to toe with the youngest and fastest of the lot, as well as stand eye to eye with legends like his brother, The Undertaker. Since it has been a really long time since the last Kane wallpaper, I decided to put one up right about now…seeing as Daniel Bryan is heading his own way and the Big Red Monster seems to be heading down the solo route again.

To be honest, this wallpaper was supposed to come out a long time ago, but I just didn’t find the right slot or chance to put it online. I figured now is about as good a time as any.

One of my all-time favorite Kane promos/backstage segments has to be the first Anger Management session alongside his then opponent, Daniel Bryan, with Dr. Shelby at the helm. Kane’s “in a nutshell” description of his life so far was absolutely priceless. It was the most awesome, most deranged description of a superstar’s career and back-story I’ve ever heard (and all this doesn’t even include the part where he was once a *ehem*dentist..and some kind of Christmas Creature or something).

The punchline – for me – was when he said he had to bury his brother…twice. It just puts the entire Kane – Undertaker saga into complete perspective and makes you wonder what ‘Taker’s life in a nutshell must sound like. I decided I wanted to use that promo for a wallpaper, and since Kane is a legend in the business with 15 solid years behind him, it worked quite well.

It’s cool to see Kane having fun with his career at the moment. I know some people are unhappy at how goofy the once-frightening monster has become, but it doesn’t really matter to me. Kane and Bryan literally revived the Tag Team Championship and had a phenomenal run with the titles. Team Hell No will go down as one of those memorable partnerships, and I’m pretty sure we’ll see an official reunion someday – even if it’s a one-off gig. And I’m sure Kane will snap again somewhere down the road. He always does. Mask or no mask, new costume or old, bald or with a head full of hair…the beast who walks through hell fire and brimstone can and will be triggered by something, and he’ll turn into a random-superstar-choke slamming machine all over again.