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Gaslighting is a common feature of toxic relationships and has grown more prevalent in our conversations around partnerships. Toxic relationships are not a brand-new concept, and unhealthy attachments have long been described using this idea. When someone is gaslighted, they are subjected to a sort of manipulation that makes them doubt reality.
Why is gaslighting a crucial issue? Extremely toxic, co-dependent relationships can develop as a result of gaslighting, and they can be difficult to leave. Both parents and romantic partners have the potential to gaslight their loved ones, which can leave psychological scars and lead to harmful relationship dynamics.
What Are Gaslighting's Adverse and Long-Term Effects?
It can be challenging to recover from gaslighting, and it can be particularly damaging to one's well-being. Typically, all forms of trust, including your own, are utterly undermined. As a result, it may be practically impossible to tell what is real and what is fake. Here are six long-term effects of gaslighting:
1) Isolation
As a result of losing faith in their perceptions, instincts, and memories, victims of gaslighting choose to spend most of their time alone. They could become cut off from their loved ones—friends and family—as well as society at large.
Owing to the isolation they have caused for themselves, they wind up falling deeper and deeper into the mental traps they have constructed. Due to their erroneous sense of self-worth, which makes them believe they are constantly mistaken, they could avoid meeting new people.
2) Psychological Distress
Most seriously, gaslighting can cause a person to suffer from severe psychological distress. They could never again be able to trust their loved ones, even if they have recovered from such mental assault. These people can be close acquaintances, family members, coworkers, or intimate partners.
Another severe effect of gaslighting is that the victim may endure long-lasting confusion or disorientation following the traumatic event. Even after considerable time has passed since they were victims of this psychological crime, they could still struggle to speak up, articulate their opinion, or stand by their judgment.
3) Self-Doubt
Victims may eventually start mistrusting themselves, and their behavior may change drastically. An outsider might notice they apologize too much, prefer staying quiet in social gatherings, or that they might avoid showing up and hanging out with friends and family members altogether. The main reason for all this could be the fact that the victim may not trust themselves anymore.
They might feel that their opinions hold no value, that they are too sensitive, or that they are "crazy" altogether. Even if none of that happens, one thing’s for certain–a victim of gaslighting would always have doubts and may second-guess certain frames of events or their personal opinions before saying them out loud.
4) Resentment
Emotional manipulation may manifest as impatience, anger, annoyance, and blame. Release from resentment is unavoidable, but finding and allowing it can be challenging. When someone mistreats you, it might be difficult to look past that unpleasant conduct. The new experiences that a victim has are also clouded by their previous experiences. The gaslighter seriously damages their perception of self, others, and the world.
5) Excessive Judgements
Since you have been judged, you want to judge others. In this way, the loop never ends. You might discover that you constantly keep an eye out for what other people are doing and hold everyone—including yourself—to very high standards. This is a way to regain control after losing it before. To get through this, it frequently takes patience and self-compassion.
6) Reduced Confidence
Victims may feel that they can never be the same again, and the effects of gaslighting can lead to a shift in personality traits. Long-term emotional abuse can also cause you to lose your sense of self-worth since you will continuously feel inadequate. You can start to doubt your ability to trust yourself to act appropriately or whether you are at fault for all that has gone wrong.
Depending on how well you can recall the specifics of past events, you feel incapable of making a realistic assessment of the current circumstances. You may feel compelled to stay in abusive circumstances because you think no one will accept you or desire you anyway or you may end up losing the confidence to step out of the relationship.
Takeaway
Gaslighting is an abusive pattern that has become more prevalent. Fortunately, because people are more aware of how to avoid it, gaslighting has become simpler to spot. Setting boundaries and, if feasible, leaving the relationship are the first steps in recovering from gaslighting.
Consider completely cutting off communication if you are in a romantic or platonic relationship. You can set limits and minimize interaction if you're in a relationship with family or coworkers. Getting some distance from your abuser will be crucial to putting yourself on the path to healing in any circumstance and in any kind of relationship.
Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a Master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.
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