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In theory, talking about mental health is simple, but in practice, it may be challenging, especially for men. According to research, 90% of those who seek therapy for issues related to mental health say that their symptoms and quality of life improve.
Additionally, according to statistics, there are twice as many women as compared to males who visit therapists. Males are also twice as likely as females to wait longer before seeking treatment after developing a mental health issue. Why do men shun counseling even if they are aware of its benefits?
Why Men Don’t Talk about Mental Health
Not only does gender influence our propensity to seek treatment, but it can also influence how we experience mental illness.
For instance, males who suffer from depression may act in ways that are considered 'masculine' by society. Some psychologists contend that men are more inclined to 'act out' through manifestations of anger, poor impulse control, and alcohol addiction.
Meanwhile, women with depression are more likely to 'act in' through feelings like worthlessness, helplessness, and guilt. Here are six reasons why males might hesitate to seek mental health treatment:
1) Man-Up
How many males grew up hearing these instructions from their father or other authority figures? That may be in response to a sports injury, a breakup with a girlfriend, or performing poorly on a project for school.
Many males are indoctrinated to accept things as they are from an early age. "Men/boys don't cry" is a common phrase deeply embedded in society. While therapy is the last option, the expression of real emotions is also second to last.
2) Excessive Focus on Self-reliance
The cultural norm for men is to help others in society and not seek help for their own well-being.
Seeking help and relying on the other person brings shame not only to the man but also to the rest of his family. For instance, driving around till we might get to our destination is a common characteristic of family road excursions.
Some men think they are not lost and don't require assistance. That relates to traveling to a vacation destination while experiencing stress, depression, or anxiety. For men, asking for help can be incredibly difficult.
3) Minimization of Pain
Many males minimize their sensations and pain when discussing issues relating to their physical or mental health.
Some may find it easier to avoid and minimize the problem than it is to acknowledge and address it. Even if they experience bouts of depression, it can be seen through the societal lens as fever or loss of interest. Not only men minimize pain but also the expression of it in front of others.
4) Cost of Talking
Some males who experience mental discomfort can have genuine concerns that disclosing their mental health conditions may harm their employment standing, future employment prospects, and interpersonal connections.
As a result, they may perform a determined cost-benefit analysis, comparing the potential benefits to mental health against the socio-occupational costs of disclosure.
Some men may continue to struggle with silence to keep their jobs and money, as they believe that any revelation could result in more costs than benefits, especially if the labor market suggests that they're readily replaceable.
5) Ask for Help Differently
When there's a chance for reciprocity, or when they believe there's a chance to aid the other person in return, men are considerably more willing to accept help.
That prevents the 'weakness' sensation that's frequently connected to asking for assistance. Men also prefer to solve problems on their own, or at least try to, before asking for assistance.
We should consider how family members, friends, medical professionals, and others might use that to support healthy self-care practices for men rather than viewing it as a barrier.
Takeaway
Therapists understand how men communicate their mental illness, but this understanding can only be helpful if men seek help in the first place.
People of any gende are held back by material and social issues, like financial positioning, racial discrimination, and a lack of inexpensive therapy options, as well as by the stigma associated with mental illness in society. Men need to be educated more on the importance of mental health in maintaining a healthy lifestyle, just like physical health.
Remember: You are not alone; you are not a burden, and you are not weak to ask for help if you are a man going through a tough time or a mental condition. There are several ways to reach out, including speaking with a friend, medical professional, or therapist. It doesn't matter how you ask for aid; the important thing is that you do.
Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a Master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.
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